Have you wondered why someone hates you without cause?

"I always hated your guts," a woman laughingly told me after church one night. "It wasn't anything you did, I just couldn't stand who you are." She said this with a smile, and I was stunned. I hardly knew this women and had no idea that she hated me. To this day I've wondered why she felt compelled to tell me.

This reminded me of when I had a line of girls standing in front of me to ask for my forgiveness. The pastor had preached how we needed to forgive one another and encouraged the listeners to ask for forgiveness if they were offended with someone. This young lady asked me to forgive her because she was jealous of me.

Their were several girls after her to tell me the same thing. Again, I had no idea that I was inciting jealousy. I never thought of myself as outstanding or beautiful. I was just trying to make it through college working 20 to 30 hours a week.

To this day I don't know why I inspire women to hate me. Women that hate me have actually helped me work hard at being free from offense. Since so many women have asked me for forgiveness, I've never felt the urgency to do that to someone else. If I have a problem with someone, I usually take care of it by praying.

If I feel the person is causing physical harm or that the offense is serious, then I try to talk to that person privately. I would rather have innocence and a pure heart towards someone than be a stumbling block for them. I've learned that God places a premium priority on how we relate to our brothers or sisters in the faith or people who we are close to. The first act of strife between Adam and Eve affects us today. And the first murder between two brothers because of envy, competition, pride and jealousy, opened the door to more darkness in mankind.

We see the long-term affects of hate in 1 John 2:9-11:

"Whoever says he is in the light but hates his brother is in darkness even until now. Whoever loves his brother lives in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in darkness, and walks in darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes."

When you hate the people that are close to you, you open yourself to darkness and confusion. Love removes any stumbling block in you. The benefits of loving your brother or sister are:

* You walk in the light. You have nothing to hide and you have a transparent life.
* You will not stumble or make a mistake or a blunder.
* You will know where you're going.

Hating your brother or sister is too costly. Forgive your brother or sister over and over again. Learn to love them unconditionally and you'll enjoy a life full of the light of God. And another takeaway here is to never feel compelled to go ask someone for forgiveness. I don't see one Scripture in the Bible that states you have to go ask for forgiveness.

I see Scriptures about confessing your sin to one another, but not a verse that you need to go tell someone that they offended you. Colossians 3:13 states, "Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."

Did I have to forgive that woman who told me she hated me? No because I had nothing against her. I hold no grudge against that woman and I hope for the best for her. The girls that formed in the line in front of me became good friends that are still in my life today.

Leilani Haywood

Today is 12-12-14, If it had not been the Lord who was on our side

Psalm 124 .1-8

1 If it had not been the Lord who was on our side, now may Israel say;

2 If it had not been the Lord who was on our side, when men rose up against us:

3 Then they had swallowed us up quick, when their wrath was kindled against us:

4 Then the waters had overwhelmed us, the stream had gone over our soul:

5 Then the proud waters had gone over our soul.

6 Blessed be the Lord, who hath not given us as a prey to their teeth.

7 Our soul is escaped as a bird out of the snare of the fowlers: the snare is broken, and we are escaped.

8 Our help is in the name of the Lord, who made heaven and earth.

Happy 12-12-14 from ASB World to all our fans.

THE MESSAGE PROCLAIMED

How then shall they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how shall they believe in Him of whom they have not heard? 

And how shall they hear without a preacher?

And how shall they preach unless they are sent? As it is written: "How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the gospel of peace, who bring glad tidings of good things!" Romans 10:14-15

From the original Greek, we could translate the final question in Romans 10:14 as, "How shall they hear without one preaching?"

The Phillips translation puts it this way, "How can they hear unless someone proclaims Him?"

Therefore, we see the emphasis is not on a preacher, but on preaching. We may think the work of evangelism is only for those who are called to be evangelists.

Granted, there are people in the church whom God has raised up to be evangelists, and certainly evangelism is not limited to those who preach to hundreds or thousands at a time.

I have seen many individual believers who obviously have this gift. While it is true that some are called to be evangelists, it is also true that every Christian is called to evangelize.

Many times, however, we avoid sharing our faith, deciding instead to just live it out, be a good witness, and leave the preaching to others.

Yet in 1 Corinthians 1:21, it says, "For since, in the wisdom of God, the world through wisdom did not know God, it pleased God through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe."

This does not mean that we need to scream and yell and wave a Bible to get the point across.

What it does mean is that we are to recognize the primary way God has chosen to reach the lost through the proclamation of the gospel by people.

God has chosen the agency of His proclaimed Word to bring people to salvation.

Prayer: Lord, empower me to spread the good news of Your kingdom everywhere I go.

Scriptural Reading: Romans: 10:5-17

Relationship: Why You Need to Man Up and Show Her Some Affection

It's not uncommon to find couples that are dating to be holding hands, hugging or even just being

close.

I can remember many times walking down the mall walkway and seeing young couples all over each other, or even being out at dinner with my wife and seeing couples that are just having a little too much fun. We've all seen those couples.

What I failed to recognize as I looked at these couples was my relationship with my wife. At that point, we had been married for about four years and we just didn't act that way anymore. The chase was over. The mystery was fading and I figured our relationship was fine with or without me trying to hold her hand or put my arm around her.

It was true that some of the mystery was gone, but it was wrong of me to think that our relationship didn't need some kind of affection anymore. Hear me out.

Practical Experiences

Think back with me for a few moments to when you were dating your wife. How often would you hold her hand while driving? How often would you move closer to her when you were at the movie theater? How often would you put you arm around her when sitting next to each other? I can honestly say I did all of these things while I was dating my wife. What about you?

But what about more recently?

As I mentioned above, it was about four years into our marriage that I stopped doing many of these affectionate things to my wife. Our marriage was already crumbling, so why would I want to do something nice for her? Why would I want to hold her hand if she didn't do certain things for me? Why would I want to pull her in close?

I was looking at love in all the wrong ways. I was looking at myself and my needs rather than her and her needs. I decided to make some changes and here are a few reasons why:

1. She's waiting for you to make a move. I've learned from my wife that there is no limit on how much affection I can show her. In a sense, her cup is always going dry and needs filling up. Even after a few years of marriage, even if there has been some turmoil in the marriage, she still wants you to make a move. So make it!

2. Your hand is better in her hand than in your lap. When I realized her need for affection, I started to pay attention to it a lot more. A quick example is when we're driving in the car together. There were many times when I would think about holding her hand or resting my hand on her leg, but I wouldn't make the move. I've come to learn that my hand does much better in hers than just sitting on my own lap.

3. You may not have another chance. Just like I mentioned the issues of "time and routine" in a recent post, I'll bring up the point again here. Time can play funny games with us and make us think that we have plenty of it. But if we look at time in a more mature way, we'll come to realize that it's short and it's not always guaranteed. You may not have another chance to make the move and hold her hand or put your arm around her. So as I said, make your move.

What's Holding You Back?

It's a simple, yet necessary question to ask after stating some obvious points in the paragraphs above. What's holding you back? What's keeping you from "making moves" on your wife again? What's halting your desire to show affection again?

I once had a long discussion with a couple that was experiencing this kind of issue. They had been married for 15-plus years and the relationship was bruised and battered at this point. But in all of that, the wife's request always stuck out to me. All she wanted was for him to show affection to her in public. She wanted him to embrace her around friends, to hold her hand when they walked into a crowded area or just put his arm around her when other friends were nearby. It might sound strange, but it was her cry and call for affection. It was the type of love that she needed from him, and he wouldn't do it. He just couldn't understand why he would need to do that type of action for her. We didn't accomplish a lot that night.

But now that you understand that mindset and idea, here are a few ideas I've come up with on what might be holding you back. Consider each point carefully and see if they are the things impacting your marriage.

• Your peers around you. I believe there is some confusion when it comes to what is manly these days. It doesn't consist of what you look like or how well you are dressed. Instead, I feel there is great manliness expressed in how well a man treats his woman. When men are around other men, it can be hard to embrace your wife in an affectionate way and still feel like a man. I think that's a lie our culture feeds us these days. I like to believe that embracing my wife around my friends is one of the strongest moves I can make in front of them. Don't be intimidated, but rather set that standard. Show off to everyone that you're proud of your wife and that no matter where you are, she deserves to be treated well.
• Your selfishness. It will blind your affectionate actions to your wife instantly. As soon as you feel the push to embrace her, you'll automatically think about your needs and at what level she is meeting them. If you can assess quickly and find her to be up to par, then you might make a move. But if you find it to be the other way around, you clam up in selfishness and pull back on any type of move. Instead, try to behave in a way that once you make a move, you open the door for her to have a desire to make a similar move for you later. Set the standard men; don't wait for it.
• Your fear. There were many times I held back just out of useless fear. I'd know what she would want, but I wouldn't do it. What if she didn't like it? What if she pushed away from me? What if I do it this time and she expects it again? Right? I think I hit the nail on the head with that last one. Fear will keep you from showing affection that first time, but embracing or pushing past that fear will yield returned rewards that will make you want to do it again. Make a move and discover it for yourself!

Simple Ways to Take Action

With all of that said, or if you just scrolled down to this last section, my encouragement to you is to man up and show her some affection. Here are only a few examples for you to consider. Add some of your examples in the comments:

• The next time you go for a drive together, go for it and hold her hand.
• The next time you are at the movies or church, go for it and put your arm around her (pull her close).
• The next time you are in a crowded area, keep her close as you guide and protect her.
• The next time you are having a dispute, grab her hand and ask her to pray with you.

Source: charismamag.com

Prayer for new week

God will do a quick work in your life. He will grant you supernatural speed for unusual

accomplishments. As the year winds to an end, expect doors of opportunities to be opened to you.
Your testimony has started in Jesus name.

Happy New Week from us ASB-World. 

YOU ARE NOT GOD'S ADVISER

For who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has become His counselor? Romans 11:34

Jesus had dropped a bombshell on the disciples. The Bible tells us, "From that time Jesus began to show to His disciples that He must go to Jerusalem, and suffer many things from the elders and chief priests and scribes, and be killed, and be raised the third day" (Matthew 16:21).

Can you imagine how shocking this would have been? Look at the details in this verse. Jesus had alluded to these things previously, but now He spelled them out plainly.

In the original language, the word Jesus used for "killed" speaks of a violent death. Imagine what the disciples must have been thinking.

Whoa! What? Lord, what are you talking about? Being killed? How could that ever be a part of any plan?

So Peter decided to straighten Jesus out. The Bible tells us, "Then Peter took Him aside and began to rebuke Him, saying, 'Far be it from You, Lord; this shall not happen to You!' "

But Jesus shot back and said, "Get behind Me, Satan! You are an offense to Me, for you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men".

Peter was trying to give God counsel. Have you ever done that? I know that I have—on many occasions.

We inform God of our plans and then ask Him to bless them. We start telling God what to do. It has been said that you can't stop a bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from building a nest in your hair.

While we can't stop a thought from knocking on the door of our imagination, we don't have to invite it in and make it our house guest.

As Peter learned, there are things we think that we should not say. You can't be God's adviser.

You can't tell God what to do. We must all submit to God's will, it is not our will but His will that will be done. Wisdom belongs to Him alone.

Prayer: Lord, You are my counselor. Teach me Your ways and direct my path.

Scriptural Reading: Romans 11:33-36

How to Talk to Teens Who Don’t Care About School

When your high-school junior or senior is on the verge of dropping out, what can you do?

David and his wife are struggling with their 17-year-old daughter. Her attitude is, "I don't care about school." She'd rather be hanging out with her friends.

Well, Dad, before exploding, I urge parents to look hard at the reasons behind the behavior. Maybe the child is over committed; maybe she's depressed or has a learning disorder. It could be some family situation that's distracting her—or a boyfriend. It could be substance abuse.

With David's daughter, it was a lack of interest. He decided to take away some of her privileges until she shows herself responsible enough to earn them back.

From there, a father has several options. One approach is to take responsibility for his child's education upon himself. That means checking with the school every day, calling teachers, driving her to and fro and sticking to his guns until she graduates. That's high-maintenance for you, dad, but it may the only way for her to get that diploma.

Or, you can put it completely on her shoulders, and introduce her to the real world.

Say something like this: "I love you, honey, and I want to provide for you. And I can provide for you because I do at least an average job at work. But since you're not doing at least an average job at school, it might be time for you to make your own way in the world. Or if you want to live here, you can get a job, pay room and board, and pay for your telephone, transportation and cable TV."

Often, this shot of reality will motivate a child to apply herself at school. If it doesn't, then you need to set that deadline for her to start paying her own way.

Whatever approach you take, dad, make sure you sit down with your teenager and talk. Talk about her needs and goals and your expectations. If you can, help her see into the future even just a year or two and she may realize that sticking it out will give her more options later on.

And stay calm, dad. Remember that your job is to be helpful and love her through this without being mean-spirited or imposing guilt.

Source: charismamag.com