Relationship: 3 ways Facebook is killing your marriage

Facebook is great. It is something that most of us use almost every day. However, it shouldn't be surprising to hear that Facebook has been mentioned in many a divorce case.

Watch out for these three ways Facebook could be killing your marriage, and make sure that Facebook doesn't change your marital status!

1. Taking time away from your spouse

It's no secret that Facebook can be a great time waster. Sure, it's fun scrolling through endless pages of status updates from people you haven't seen in years (or, if your news feed is anything like mine, from people you can't even remember meeting). What could be more entertaining than reading about Jessie's 7-year-old's loose tooth, looking at what Joe ordered for dinner or watching mind-numbing videos?

Kidding aside, Facebook can become quite addicting and can consume inordinate amounts of time. Before you know it, you've wasted your entire evening staring at a screen instead of your gorgeous spouse. So, before you waste another minute, log off of Facebook and log on to your spouse.

2. Keeping track of old "friends"

Obviously, one of the best parts about Facebook is being able to stay connected with friends and family. It's easy to check a status update and instantly know what's going on with your cousin Mike — or anyone else for that matter. No doubt, it's a great way to find out about things you feel you should have already known about (Say what? My little brother's engaged?). And who doesn't appreciate those birthday reminders?

Unfortunately, this ability to stay "in the know" with anyone and everyone also has its downsides. Have you ever had that urge to check out what your high school sweetheart is doing now? Have you ever wondered what he or she looks like 25 years later? All too often, that temptation to just "see what they're up to" is the beginning of a slippery slope.

Let's be honest. People tend to overemphasize their virtues on Facebook. When's the last time you saw someone post a picture of himself first thing in the morning when he looked like a mess? Seeing the too-good-to-be-true side of your old "special friend" doesn't benefit your marriage. It can feed comparison and even lead to thoughts of "what could have been." That's certainly not a recipe for a happy and healthy marriage.

3. Reconnecting and developing relationships with old "friends" or other members of the opposite sex

One of my favorite things about Facebook is the ability to connect with people from around the world. For example, I lived in Sydney, Australia for a couple of years and have since lost contact with people whom I consider to be great friends. Facebook makes it easy to find and reconnect with them — to build upon friendships that would otherwise be lost.

As great as this ability to reconnect is, it can present a serious danger to your marriage. Too many people — both male and female — are seeking emotional connection, validation and understanding from people online rather than from their spouses. If they're feeling unfulfilled in their marriages, they look elsewhere to have their needs met rather than turning to the people who matter most. Unfortunately, seemingly innocent chats online can quickly lead to emotional infidelity and turn into meetings, dates and more.

Ask yourself this question. "What is my motivation in messaging this person?" If that motivation has anything to do with physical attraction, emotional involvement or getting back at your spouse, then perhaps you should reconsider your use of Facebook. The fact is, even if your motives are innocent, the ability to message and "like" someone of the opposite sex can send a message that may easily be misinterpreted, damaging your relationship with your spouse. read more here

So remember, as wonderful as Facebook is, it's not as wonderful as your spouse. Watching out for these three dangerous trends will help you avoid a lot of contention, heartache and regret.

KEYS TO VICTORY

And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, and they did not love their lives to the death.

Revelation 12:11

Our victory in Christ is not achieved on our own merit but through the grace of God.

It is only through His grace that we overcome our eternal adversary — satan, as well as other challenges we encounter in life. We overcome on three counts:

• The blood of the Lamb: Jesus is the Lamb of God who was ordained from the foundation of the world to be slain.

The death of Christ on the cross of Calvary was the beginning of our deliverance which was completed through His resurrection. For our sins He died that we might be reconciled to God.

His blood is that which paid the price for our sins and delivered us from the power and control of satan.

Anytime we plead the blood of Jesus in our prayers, we re-affirm the great victory that was accomplished two thousand years ago on our behalf. The blood of Christ caused the defeat of satan.

• The word of our testimony: When we boldly declare the Lordship of Christ over our lives, we eliminate every other being or power that seeks to lord it over us.

Our testimony of what Christ has done and continues to do in our lives, keeps the enemy in his place of defeat.

• Loyalty to the end: Our long term-commitment to the Lord tells the enemy that nothing He does can separate us from the Love of God in Christ Jesus. He can do his worst but we will remain committed to the Lord with our whole lives.

Prayer: Jesus, You are my Lord and Your blood gives me victory.

Scriptural Reading: Revelation 12:1-12

Do 2 Wrongs Make a Right? Read This.....

I know you have probably heard this question before, “Do 2 Wrongs Make a Right?” The answer is emphatically no! When you have two wrongs you simply have two wrongs. The is especially true when it comes to disagreements or should I say arguing.

When you find disagreements and arguments creeping up as a part of your life, take a step back and assess the situation. Yes, assess the situation. It may feel strange doing this if you are used to protecting yourself with your words.  However, if you want to lessen the arguments and disagreements you have in your relationships, stop, and take an assessment before blasting out words you cannot take back.
In the midst of a disagreement both parties think they are right. Each stands their ground to prove their point and show who’s wrong.

Once spoken, hurtful words cannot be taken back. In the heat of an argument words spoken can be cutting and hurtful. Once the fussing is over you are left trying to make amends and clean up the damage. It takes effort and self restraint but it is sooo much easier to take stock of what you are about to say before it parts your lips than to go back and try to mend strained relationships, hurt feelings, and broken hearts because words were spoken from a place of rage.
When in a relationship with another person whether it’s a parent, spouse, or child don’t let yourself get to a place of rage where you have no guard over the things that are coming from your mouth. In a moments time you can go from peaceful blitz to crazy rage. In that situation it is not the other person’s fault, they did not make you do that. If control cannot be established over “going there” then that is a personal issue that needs some attention.

Two wrongs do not make a right. You just end up with two wrongs. Take time to listen. Sometimes people just need to be heard. Listen, sometimes there’s a cry for help disguised in a rant. Listen, sometimes there’s an underlying issue that needs to be addressed. Listen, with ears to understand and a heart to heal rather than an ear to condemn and find fault. A gentle answer turns away wrath. But a mouth that spews venom only adds to the poisonous mix. We all have to begin somewhere. The best place to begin is from the point you stand at today. The good thing about today is that it’s a doorway to your future. Read here

There will be times when you disagree with another person but arguing, fussing and heated disagreements do not have to be a regular part of your future. It is possible to live a peaceable life without these things. The next time you feel an argument stirring, stop, take assessment of the situation and handle it with good care.

YOU ARE SO SPECIAL

Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God! Therefore the world does not know us, because it did not know Him. 1 John 3:1

What you believe about yourself, that is your self worth, sets the limits for your life.

We can see ourselves from different points of view.
• We can see ourselves as the world sees us: this makes us slaves of other people.

• We can see ourselves as we see ourselves: this can make us either arrogant or timid.

• We can see ourselves the way God sees us: this frees us to be the best we can be.

When we see ourselves the way God sees us, it enables us to live our lives the way God intends us to live.

The problem that many people have today is, they don't really even like themselves.

They constantly focus on their faults and shortcomings and then wonder why they don't enjoy life or have any enthusiasm or why their relationships aren't working.

Understand that you cannot be negative toward yourself and expect to live a positive, faith-filled life.

In order to love yourself so that you can love others, you have to first of all accept that God loves you unconditionally. That thought will liberate you from any sense of inferiority.

It focuses your identity on God and not on what you have or do not have. When you start thinking like a beloved child of the Most High God, who is crowned with favour, you'll be amazed at what will happen.

You will rise from a life of defeat to a life of victory in Christ.
When you love yourself the way God loves you, you will find peace, joy and victory in every area of your life!

Prayer: Thank You Heavenly Father for loving me without reservation.

Scriptural Reading: 1 John 3:1-3

“HOW I KILLED MY WIFE INADVERTENTLY” PLS READ !

“HOW I KILLED MY WIFE INADVERTENTLY” HUSBANDS AND WIVES, DON’T PROLONG YOUR QUARRELS.

Husbands and wives should learn how to settle their quarrels without delay. I have seen situations where couples allow simple disagreement to fester for days. Husband is silently hurting, expecting the wife to speak to him first. Same for the wife, hurting and expecting the husband to play the man. The waiting game leads from one thing to the other. If you are at this level of matrimony, please read this.

You might have a reason to call your spouse and together take an oath that “OUR QUARREL WOULD NOT LAST BEYOND THAT MOMENT.”

The story as told by the reverend: Husband and his wife (his church members) had a domestic disagreement one morning. The man said he was was so bitter about it, claiming his wife knew she was wrong but refused to apologise. She felt it was a non issue and the husband should overlook easily. To say “I am sorry, darling”, to her husband was difficult for her. So many people are like that. So many wives take their husbands for granted tooooooooo much. We are humans Blood flows in
our veins.

Three days on, malice reigned in the house. The husband said he must get that “I am sorry.” Wife cooked, husband refused to eat. Everyday he came home with food from Tantalizer. He boycotted matrimonial bed. Husband found new friends in the children. Same with wife. By the way, the children were too small to break the ice. I’ve been there before. Thank God I am wiser now.

On Sunday, last Sunday, they went to church in their different cars but sat side by side during service, pretending to be jolly good husband and wife. Fraud in the house of God! May God forgive some husbands and wives. But after service, husband went home with the children while she
waited for women’s meeting.

That day, Satan decided to enter the crevice they allowed in their home. The husband was home already. When he perfunctorily checked his phone, his wife had called him thrice. He disregarded calling her back. Malice. The wife drove in some
forty minutes later. He saw Usman opening the gate for her as his phone went on ringing. He checked it. It was his wife. She was in her car at the garage already. What is she calling me for? Foolish and stubborn wife! He said and ignored her calls.
The call went on for a while. He ignored it as he sat with the TV.

Thirty minutes later, she did not come in. Something told him to go and check. Is she still in the car? Yes she must be there. He called Usman, Is madam in the car? Few minutes later, Usman rushed in. Madam dey sleep inside the car o. That was when he woke up and rushed downstairs. Asthma! Could she be having her usual attack? Could she have forgotten her inhaler? He quickly took the inhaler and rushed downstairs. When he
got there, she was almost breathless. Usman and husband quickly carried her to the back seat and off, he sped like a bat out of hell, to the clinic nearby. Madam was confirmed dead!

If he had picked her call early enough, probably she could have been saved. When you leave domestic disagreement to fester for too long, it leads to greater evil. The preacher said husband is weeping mad, blaming himself…i killed my wife! see here

Only God knows how many wives, husbands, children have died such a needless death.
Couples must learn to forgive each other and ask after each others welfare. No matter how angry you are try to call each other even if you have nothing in particular to say. Try to remain the best of friends you have always being….Cheers.

LOVE IS A BEAUTIFUL THING

ALL BLESSINGS ARE YOURS

Blessed be the Lord, Who daily loads us with benefits, the God of our salvation! Psalm 68:19

When we ask God for our daily bread, what do we mean? Is it merely food to nourish our body? Is it all the basic necessities of life? Does it include the bread Jesus spoke of: the Word of God?

It is all these things and more. Our heavenly Father wants us to have everything we need to affirm His image within us.

God never calls His children to tasks they are not ready for, and He will not abandon us without the resources we need to succeed.

Our God provides us with everything we need to be the best people we can be.

Call upon the Lord to load you daily with benefits. He will do even more than you expect. God desires that you live in victory in every area of your life.

The scripture says He always causes us to triumph through Christ Jesus! No matter what you may be facing today. God wants to make you more than a conqueror.

Are you battling sickness? God wants to give you healing. Are you struggling with a broken relationship? God wants to give you restoration and peace.

Are you facing a need-physically, spiritually, or emotionally? God wants to give you provision and supply all your needs according to His riches in glory.

Many times in the Bible when God's people were going into battle, the worshippers were out in front of the warriors.

When you choose to be thankful and bless the Lord in the midst of your battle, you are making a way for Him to move in your life.

Start today by thanking Him for His goodness and the promise to give you the victory.

Magnify your God, don't magnify your problems!

As you do, you'll see Him move on your behalf and He'll lead you into victory in every area of your life!

Prayer: Lord, fill me up with the bread of heaven and satisfy my soul with Your presence.

Scriptural Reading: Psalm 68:19-27

Relationship: My Spouse Cheated, Now What?

It's probably the worst fear within a relationship. What if my spouse meets someone else?

For ladies, the fear is that her husband will give his heart to another woman, pouring into her his feelings and attention and time. For men, it's more so the fear that your wife will meet someone else and have a physical relationship with them.

There are two stages of adultery and affairs, the first is emotional; the second is physical. Some affairs are found out and ended while still during the emotional stage; others have gone on long enough (time is relevant to the people involved) to have made it physical. Both of which started in the mind.

I must warn you that what I'm referencing here is very different from a sexual addiction. Some may cheat multiple times in many different scenarios looking to fulfill a lust driven by the flesh that is fueled by an addiction of which there is very little emotional involvement. This is different and should be handled differently.

Pure Life Ministries is a resource that concentrates on this type of situation if that is your case. This article is specific to an emotional or physical affair that seems to take the place of your spouse. If I were to give you one single piece of marriage advice that I believe trumps all others, it would be this: Guard your thoughts.

Proverbs 4:23 states "Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life."

That's not a verse advocating a breakfast cereal to cut down on heart disease. It means guard your thoughts. Guard your emotions. Guard who or what you rent space to in your mind. Bounce your eyes when you see an attractive person, cut off a conversation if it seems to linger too long or evoke feelings of flattery within you. These are all protective maneuvers to be placed beforehand.

A great resource for this is the book Hedges by Jerry Jenkins. For the rest of this article I want to focus on your choices in the event an affair has happened and come into the light, what choices do you have?  You have two—release or restore.

1. Release. Trust is broken. Your heart feels as though it has been put through a meat grinder. Your view of the world has probably grown a little colder and a little dimmer. You have an anger that burns within you and your first inclination is to either run or to get revenge. You don't possibly see how things could ever recover and you lose hope that you have a future together.

At this point you begin to focus on all your rights. I have the right to be happy. I have the right to be loved by someone else who will treat me with respect. I have the right to a divorce. Jesus said so. "I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery" (Matt. 19:9). "I have the right! Jesus said, 'Except for sexual immorality.' That is my out and I can be released from this marriage without guilt, without trying to salvage it and without a fight."

The problem is, you may be released without any of those things, but you will be released with consequences, especially if you have children. The following areas have been statistically proven to be affected by divorce:

• Children's mental and emotional well-being
• Children's academics
• Adults' emotional well-being
• Chance of divorce rises for second marriage
• Chance of divorce in children's future marriages rises
• Financial hardships due to supporting two households on same income

The first statement that went through your mind is: "Yes, but it is not healthy for children to see mom and dad fighting all the time either." Agreed, it's not. But there is no statistic that says children suffer because mom and dad figured it out and then sought help and made their marriage work. There are plenty of statistics to the contrary though. There are lots of rights that you have if your spouse has cheated on you, but don't forsake your responsibilities over your rights.

2. Restore. Understandably there are going to be times when both people just cannot get on the same page and make an agreement to move forward. That's not an excuse, but it is a reality. So I'm going to focus on the ones in which the cheating spouse says, "I was wrong, I'm sorry. I want to come home." 

Should you forgive them? Yes. There is life for a marriage on the other side of a nasty crisis. It takes two hearts yielded to God—both the offending and the offended—to make it work. It starts with a decision. There are times when one spouse wants to be restored and the other doesn't want to restore. Those are times when you can seek God for help with forgiveness and pray for the turnaround of your spouse's heart.

People make mistakes. People go too far. Sometimes people break your heart, but if you focus on your responsibilities rather than your rights, you can get through this. When both the offending spouse and the offended spouse seek God and recognize their own faults that resulted in this crisis, healing can begin.

It takes two to tango, it takes two to admit their wrongs, and it takes two to fix a marriage. Restoration is not an easy road and neither is release. So if you're going to have to endure the pain of a process, why not choose one that can have better results and long-lasting positive effects on your family? My wife and I chose the restoration route, and we have never looked back. Life and marriage is good.

Lord, I pray over those who have read these words today. Give them direction, give them strength, and allow Your love and forgiveness to shine through them like You did for me and my wife. Allow their restoration to be as miraculous and healing and beautiful as ours was. Pick them up from the miry clay and set them firmly upon the Rock that is Your Son, Jesus Christ. Amen.

Pls free to comment down below......

Stephen Miller