The 9 things you should never say in a fight with your child

Disagreements between you and your children are a fact of parenthood. When aging children begin asserting their independence, things can quickly turn for the worse when your "not-so-little ones" become blatantly disobedient and disrespectful.

When it comes to fighting with your kids, fight fair by avoiding these nine phrases at all costs:

1. Profanities

Profanities are a total no-no. Don't fire back when your child hurls these at you. In the end, you are the adult and everything you do is teaching your child how to behave when he reaches adulthood. If you throw out profanities during a fight with your child, he'll do the same to your grandkids.

2. "You're/You're a (insert any insulting label here)"

Part of fighting fair is constructively expressing your real feelings and concerns and then working toward resolving them. Labels and insults do neither and only cause hurt feelings or increased anger. These words stick to your child like glue and may greatly affect his relationships and self-esteem for years to come.

3. "I never wanted you," or "I wish I never had you!"

It's easy to rebut the classic kiddy tantrum, "I wish I'd never been born," with one of these doozies. But don't drop that bomb. Questioning the validity of your child's right to exist is never a thought you want to implant in his mind — and it may come back to haunt you if he tries to make it a reality.

4. "You were a mistake," or "You ruined my life!"

Blaming your child for being here doesn't make sense and doesn't make you look mature enough to be a parent. Being born was not his decision — it was yours. And even in the heat of the moment, making such an ugly claim says more about you than it says about him.

5. "Why can't you be more like __?"

Comparing your wayward child to a more upstanding citizen is easy when he hits those tumultuous teen years. But your child is just trying to find himself. He is who he is, and asking him to be someone else is the same as telling him, "You're not good enough the way you are."

6. "I hate you," or "I don't love you!"

Let's hope neither of these statements is true. Pointless and tactless, they just create a greater divide between you and your beloved child. Even if they are true, they still don't need to be said — and it might be time for counseling!

7. "Shut up, I don't care!"

Listening is much harder and much more important than speaking. What caused the argument in the first place is likely a breakdown in communication, so reinforcing the point that you are unwilling to listen to your child will only further the insult and injury.

8. "I'm leaving," or "I'm not coming back!"

Your child needs you, no matter how much he claims he doesn't. Don't ever give your child a reason to feel abandoned. If you need to step outside to get some air, do it. But don't take your keys, and give yourself a time frame in which to return. Then, come back!

9. "Get out!"

Your child needs a safe haven to call home and a comfortable place to rest his head. Ripping this away from him is not only against the law, it causes catastrophic damage to your relationship. And your child may not be so willing to return when you've calmed down and want him to come back.

Keeping your wits in the midst of a meltdown with your kid takes grace, patience and immense amounts of self-discipline and self-control. But as the parent, this is the responsibility you took on when you started your family. Be the adult, and make sure every argument works toward a resolution — and remember to keep those unkind words to yourself. Source.

Health: See Where You’re Getting Fat The Most & Solutions

The scientists have acknowledged 6 different obesity types that are based on factors which are causing them, and solution to every single one of them. So, here is the list of the 6 obesity types and how to solve them.

1: Food Obesity
The food obesity type is gotten from an excessive food and water intake. It’s manifesting with upper body fat and protruding stomach. The simple solution of this is to reduce the food amount and the sugar intake. Also, you should try to exercise for about 30 minutes each day.


2: “Nervous Stomach” Obesity
The central culprits for this sort of obesity are stress and anxiety. Even the excessive intake of sweets and depression could give you this sort of obesity.The solution to this obesity type is controlling the physical activities to reduce the stress and to manage the anxiety.

3: Gluten Obesity
This sort of obesity is very common amongst the women, mostly during the adolescence period and menopause, or whenever they are experiencing some hormonal imbalance. The best way to manage this is avoiding sitting on a same spot for long time, exercising regularly with weight, and avoiding smoking and intake of alcohol.

4: Atherogenic Metabolic Obesity
This type is characterizing with very big stomach, which is looking like big balloon. It could seem that your body fat is accumulated in your stomach. This could also cause troubles with breathing for the people who are consuming alcohol.

5: Venous Obesity
This is referring to the obesity that is occurring as result of a venous circulation and is usually inherited. The venous obesity is very common during the pregnancy and among people who are having swollen legs. The best solution to this unpleasant situation is exercising, for instance, running or climbing stairs. Read here

6: Obesity as result of inactivity
This is a sort of obesity that is affecting some body parts that were very active. It’s common amongst people that used to do more rigorous exercises, but aren’t slacking. If you are having this obesity type, going long periods without having food will aid your body to burn fat by speeding up the metabolism.

Prayer for new week

You will never go below the level that you are; rather you will go higher and higher everyday.

That debt that has caused fear for you will be paid in a miraculous way. You will have extra to meet your needs in Jesus mighty name.Whatever is troubling your mind will suddenly vanish and you will have joy unspeakable. 

Before this week comes to an end, you will encounter favour that will completely and permanently change the story of your life for better in Jesus name.

Happy new week folks have a bless week from us ASB's World.

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FORGIVE

Repent therefore of this your wickedness, and pray God if perhaps the thought of your heart may be forgiven you. For I see that you are poisoned by bitterness and bound by iniquity." - Acts 8:22-23

This is a scene that all of us might have seen before. It happens in novels, movies and dramatic productions.

A miserable, depressed, emotionally broken person hunched over a set of suspicious looking chemicals. His eyes are menacing.

His jaws are set. His fingers are methodically adding just a pinch of this and a dash of that to the evil-looking green fluid in the test tube before him.

His thoughts are filled with a mixture of dated images carrying memories of hatred for a grievance long past. He is thinking of the one who hurt him, and he is concocting some deadly poison for the offender.

After finishing with the preparation of his medicine of death, he breathes a sigh of relief as he straightens up, marvelling at the liquid vengeance he has created and mutters, "This will show him."

He turns and mixes the poisonous substance in the drink of the target of his bitterness.

Then tragedy strikes. He forgets the cup he poured the poison into and ends up mistakenly drinking his own poison.

Bitterness is a poison that we prepare for someone else, but then drink ourselves. It is a concentrated dose of emotional poison, often one that we carefully nurture and grow over the course of years.

When we react to someone's wrongdoing by withdrawing and giving our minds over to daydreams of retribution and evil plans, we are slowly poisoning our own hearts and minds.

Ask God to reveal any signs of poison in your system. Then, give yourself a dose of the antidote - forgiveness.

Prayer: Lord, give me the grace to forgive all those who have hurt me.

Scriptural Reading: Acts 8:13-25

SEE YOURSELF AS GOD SEES YOU

Then Caleb quieted the people before Moses, and said, "Let us go up at once and take possession, for we are well able to overcome it." Numbers 13:30

Three groups of people were made to submit themselves to scientific experiments to test the effect of mental suggestion on their strength. They were to grip a strength-measuring instrument with all their strength under three different sets of conditions.

The first group was tested under normal conditions. The average grip was 45 kilograms.

The second group was told that they were very weak and did not have the muscle mass to lift heavy weights. Their average grip this time was only 13 kilograms!

In the third group they were told that they had athletic muscle mass and were naturally endowed with strength to handle heavy weights. The average grip jumped to 64 kilograms.

The results of the tests proved that human performance is critically impacted by the human mindset. Although all the people in the three groups had similar strengths, the thoughts that were planted into their minds about themselves influenced their performance.

The verdict is clear: the way people act is based on the way they perceive themselves. None of us wants to miss the blessings God has planned for us.

However, because of our own negative attitude and wrong choices, we often live lives that are way below our potential.

Israel wandered in the desert for 40 years because they allowed negativity and a sense of powerlessness to govern their attitudes and choice. Like the people in the strength-test experiment, Israel responded to their challenges based on their self-image.

When they thought of themselves as grasshoppers, they fell. When they thought like slaves from Egypt, they failed; when they thought as liberated people of the Most High God, they won.

Prayer: Help me O Lord, to think of myself the way You think of me.

Scriptural Reading: Numbers 13:1-33

Health: How to Get Rid of Dark Elbows and Knees

The skin around the elbows and knees is usually thicker and has more folds than its surrounding skin. Also, because there are no oil glands in these areas, this skin tends to be drier. So, when proper care and hygiene is not maintained, the skin on knees and elbows becomes much darker than other parts of your body.   

Some other factors that contribute to dark elbows and knees are frequent rubbing, overexposure to the sun, genetic factors, dry skin, hormonal imbalance, obesity, dead skin buildup and increased melanin pigment.This is a common issue that can make one self-conscious about wearing short-sleeve dresses and tops as well as skirts and shorts.

Several natural remedies and simple skin care techniques can help solve this problem.

1. Coconut Oil

Coconut oil is a good remedy to lighten dark knees and elbows. It has vitamin E that can help lighten the skin tone and prevent dryness by keeping the skin hydrated and moisturized. It can even repair dark and damaged skin.

• After each shower or bath, apply coconut oil on your knees and elbows and massage gently for 1 to 2 minutes. Reapply several times a day to prevent dryness.
• Alternatively, prepare a mixture with 1 teaspoon of coconut oil and ½ teaspoon of lemon juice. Rub this solution on your dark elbows and knees and let it sit for 15 to 20 minutes. Wipe it off with paper towels. Do this once daily.
• You can also add enough coconut oil to 1 tablespoon of walnut powder to make a thick paste. Use it to exfoliate dark skin patches around your knees and elbows 2 or 3 times a week.

2. Lemon

Lemon has natural bleaching as well as exfoliating properties. Also, it has a high amount of vitamin C that helps remove dead cells and lighten skin tone. It can also promote regeneration of healthy skin cells.

• Apply lemon juice on your elbows and knees and massage gently for a few minutes. Leave it on for about 20 minutes. Wash it off with warm water and apply a moisturizing lotion.
• You can also extract the juice of 1 lemon and mix it with 1 tablespoon of honey. Apply it on the affected areas and leave it on for 20 minutes. Wash the mixture off with water.

Follow either of these remedies once daily for a couple of weeks. After applying lemon juice, avoid sun exposure for the next 3 hours.

3. Yogurt

Yogurt contains lactic acid that helps lighten skin color. It also cleanses and moisturizes the skin.

• Mix 1 teaspoon each of plain yogurt and white vinegar to get a smooth paste. Apply it on the affected areas and let it dry. Rinse it off with warm water, pat dry and apply a moisturizer. Do this daily for a few weeks.
• Alternatively, mix 2 tablespoons of gram flour and 1 tablespoon of plain yogurt to make a thick paste. Apply it on your darkened elbows or knees and leave it on for 20 minutes. Then, rub with wet fingers to remove the paste and rinse with water. Do this 2 or 3 times a week.

4. Sugar

To lighten the skin tone of your knees and elbows, you can also use a homemade sugar scrub. Sugar granules help exfoliate dead skin cells and soften the skin.

1. Mix equal amounts of sugar and olive oil to make a thick paste.
2. Apply this paste on your knees and elbows and rub it around using circular motions for 5 minutes.
3. Wash it off with a mild soap and warm water.
4. Do this once daily until the skin tone around your knees and elbows lightens.
5. Repeat this treatment on a weekly basis.

5. Baking Soda

Baking soda acts as a gentle cleanser, hence it is effective for treating dark knees and elbows. It can help remove dead skin cells and reduce hyper-pigmentation that forms around the knees and elbows.

1. Prepare a paste with 1 tablespoon each of milk and baking soda.
2. Apply it on the affected areas and rub it around in circular motions for 2 to 3 minutes.
3. Wash it off with lukewarm water and pat dry the area thoroughly.
4. Repeat every other day until you get the desired results.

6. Aloe Vera

Aloe vera is a natural skin lightener that will also keep the skin hydrated and moisturized. It can help maintain even skin tone and promote the repair of skin cells damaged by sun exposure.

1. Extract the gel by breaking open a fleshy aloe vera leaf.
2. Apply it to the affected areas.
3. Let it sit for 20 minutes, then wash it off with warm water.

Repeat 1 or 2 times daily for a few weeks.

7. Almond

Both almonds and almond oil are good for your skin. Almonds are rich in skin-nourishing properties that can help maintain an even skin tone and keep your skin healthy and glowing.

• Massage the affected areas with warm almond oil for about 5 minutes daily before going to bed. Within a few days, you should notice improvement.
• Alternatively, mix 1 to 2 tablespoons of coarsely powdered almonds with a little yogurt to make a thick paste. Apply it on the darkened elbows and knees. Allow it to dry, then with wet fingers rub in circular motions. Wash it off with cold water. Do this once or twice daily for a few weeks.

8. Mint

Mint contains several volatile oils that promote collagen in the body. It helps maintain an even skin tone and makes skin glow with health.

1. Boil ½ cup of water with a handful of mint leaves for 2 to 3 minutes.
2. Add the juice of ½ lemon to it, strain and allow the solution to cool.
3. Soak a cotton ball in this solution and rub it on your knees and elbows.
4. Leave it on for 15 to 20 minutes, then wash it off with warm water.
5. Follow this treatment 1 or 2 times daily until you are satisfied with the results.

9. Turmeric

Turmeric is also highly recommended for dark elbows and knees. It can help maintain an even tone and adds a nice glow to the skin.

• Mix a little turmeric powder with 1 teaspoon of milk cream. Apply it on your knees and elbows and massage for a few minutes. Allow it to dry, then wash it off with lukewarm water.
• Alternatively, combine equal amounts of turmeric powder and gram flour. Add enough rose water to it to make a paste. Massage this paste onto your elbows and knees. Leave it on until it is dry. Finally, scrub off the dried mask with lukewarm water.

10. Cucumber

Cucumber has natural bleaching properties that help lighten dark elbows and knees. Also, cucumber will help keep the skin moisturized and aid in removing impurities from the outer skin layer.

• Gently rub thick slices of cucumber over your elbows and knees for 10 minutes. Leave it for another 5 minutes, then rinse it off with cold water. Follow this treatment daily.
• Alternatively, mix together equal amounts of cucumber juice and lemon juice. Stir in a little turmeric powder. Apply it on the affected areas. Leave it on for 20 to 30 minutes, then wash it off with water. Do this daily. source

Additional Tips

• Massage your knees and elbows with shea butter or cocoa butter every night before going to bed.
• Rub a thick potato slice over your knees and elbows for 5 minutes daily before taking a shower or bath.
• You can rub a small slice of ripe papaya onto the skin to enjoy soft and supple skin.
• Do not put pressure on your elbows and knees as it can make the skin dark as well as rough.
• Protect your knees and elbows from the sun’s harmful ultraviolet (UV) rays by wearing sunscreen throughout the year.
• Scrub your skin regularly with a scrubber or pumice stone.
• Avoid exfoliating your knees and elbows if you have an open wound as it may make it worse and increase the chances of infection.
• Apply moisturizer regulalrly on your skin to prevent dryness.
• Wear full-length and long-sleeved clothes when you are out and the temperature is high.
• Follow a healthy diet that includes vitamins and minerals for optimal skin nourishment.
• Drink 8 to 10 glasses of water everyday to enjoy soft and healthy skin.

Prayer for the new week

Everyone you meet shall favor you, cos this is your week of divine favor and visitation. The Lord shall revive you and everything about your life. Joy, peace and good health shall be yours and every member of your family in Jesus name. 

The Almighty God will intervene in that issue which requires urgent attention. Though it seems all hope is lost, but God will show up before the issue becomes embarrassing in Jesus name.

Happy new week from ASB'World.

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