The Ten Behaviors That Keep You Single

 Are You Getting In Your Own Way?

If you are single, but would rather not be, I am sure you have given significant thought about why. I know what you’re thinking: Why is it that you don’t have a man yet certain people around you seem to hop (sometimes effortlessly) from one relationship to another? Well, one answer is it may not be your season. For many, it is as simple as that.

However, for others, it’s actually the right time but they’re practicing the wrong behaviors and essentially standing in their own way. (Now, before you get upset with me, just listen.) Here are 10 things I have personally witnessed my single female clients and friends do that keep them single. Are you guilty too?

You Don't Believe In Love: If you truly think you are destined to live life alone or you are of the thought that Michelle Obama married the “last good man on earth,” you’ll be right. Why? Because our belief is our reality.

You Hold On to Someone Who Isn't Available: There are many reasons someone may not be available to date. Is he separated or married? Perhaps he is living with his girlfriend? If you hold on to such a person, fully knowing you are shared with someone else, you illustrate the lowest form of self-love and that won't get you where you want to go.

You Don't Believe Him When He Tells You the Truth: Many times, men will directly tell you their outlook on the relationship. They’ll say things like, “I’m not interested in anything serious” or “I don’t see myself being married.” If you hear anything similar, don’t think you’re the one person who can and will change his perspective. Trust me, you can’t; you won’t. Moreover, you’ll just end up wasting your time and resources. You only have power to change yourself.

Being a Toxic Date: Toxic dates are the ones who complain all the time. They are the ones who always blame you. They may always turn things around to make it someone else’s fault. They overreact to bad events. If all of this sounds familiar, "they" could be you. Toxic people are a huge energy drain. No matter how outwardly attractive or successful someone is, toxicity just ain’t sexy.

You Do Nothing Differently: My favorite question to ask prospective clients is: “How many dates have you gone on in the last two years?” Most answer “zero.” (FYI - The average single in the U.S. has not been on one date in the last two years). Then my second question is always, “Are you happy with your number?” Most say no. My final question is always, “What are you doing differently to change it?” Most say “nothing.” The bottom line is that in every aspect of our life (dating included) we can’t do the same old thing and expect different results.

You Take Bad Advice from Friends and Family: I have written a full chapter on this in my book. Your friends are not relationship experts. Your loved ones often give bad advice. It’s well meaning, but awful, dating advice because they aren’t objective. Plus, they aren’t therapists or dating experts.

You Commit Too Soon: A top dating mistake that I see my clients make often is going from casually dating someone to exclusively dating that someone within a short period of time. This is a widespread issue. In 2012, the average U.S. couple became exclusive within just five dates. This is much too soon. Why, because it takes time to observe their values and it you also don’t know someone until you have witnessed them in a time of adversity.

You're Lowering Your Standards to Compete: If you are concerned that because there are “so many women” vying for the man you are interested in you must “compete” and do things not within your value structure (like have sex earlier than planned), stop it. The moment you bend on your boundaries is the moment you begin to bully yourself.

You're Adhering to Ultimatums: Love is not selfish. Love doesn’t come with strings attached. If you have to give in to get him, get out.

Being List Obsessed: Do you chase after preferences? (You know, like he must be 6-foot tall and have perfect teeth?) We all have preferences and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. The problem is when we don’t secure our own needs first. These are what I call in my book, “your relationship vitals” (values, personality type, non-starters, and attraction traits) and become obsessed with them opposed to what’s on a list of frills.

By Paul Carrick Brunson

Health: 5 Health Areas for Parents to Monitor With Their Kids

There is nothing I enjoy more than raising my four children, but I have found it to be a challenge to raise healthy-weight children in today’s society. With the tripling of the child obesity rate in our country, there are record numbers of children experiencing health problems that a generation ago were primarily observed in adults.

As a physician's assistant in family medicine, my job is not only to treat patients for their various health problems, but also to educate patients on ways to prevent diseases.

Lifestyle changes can be challenging, but when I took a successful child obesity intervention and prevention program that I had implemented in my community, the “Family Fitness Challenge,” and brought it to my church, I found that by combining current medical research about behaviors associated with obesity along with Bible verses to meditate on, it further inspired parents to make changes in their household that had a huge impact on the health of their entire family.

While there are multiple contributors to the child obesity epidemic, here are five areas that parents need to pay the most attention to:

1. Sleep. Research shows that people who regularly sleep too little and at the wrong time suffer long-lasting consequences: an increase in obesity and risk of diabetes, heart disease and other health problems. American children are the most sleep-deprived in the world. Children should get 10 to 12 hours of sleep at night, teenagers eight to nine, and adults eight.

“Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will fall by following their example of disobedience” (Heb. 4:11, NIV).

2. Eat enough produce. The recommendations for the servings of produce came out when it was discovered that five servings was the minimum daily amount that was needed to reduce heart disease, cancers and obesity. According to the American Heart Association, the cardiovascular health of today’s youth is foreshadowing bad news for their adult years and the future of our country’s public health, after a survey found that less than 1 percent of teenagers in America met this ideal dietary goal.

“At the end of the ten days they looked healthier and better nourished than any of the young men who ate the royal food. So the guard took away their choice food and the wine they were to drink and gave them vegetables instead” (Dan. 1:15-16).

3. Limit media time. Of all the areas I speak to patients about, our society’s excessive amount of time spent on media is the habit that poses the greatest challenge. Most parents underestimate the amount of time their kids spend on media. Current data reveals that U.S. children spend an average of 7.5 hours a day staring at screens. This screen time is affecting their physical activity, slowing their metabolism, interfering with their sleep cycles, exposing them to toxic advertising, and taking over time that could be spent interacting with family, friends, honing their artistic skills or growing their spiritual life. It is recommended that children limit screen time to two hours or less a day. With the excess time that children and adults are spending on screens, their hearts and minds are being continuously bombarded with the material and sometimes corrupt values of the world.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Phil. 4:8).

4. Get enough physical activity. According to a recent study, Americans are spending eight hours a day barely moving. Couch-potato adults are now raising couch-potato children. With physical activity no longer being scheduled into our daily lives, our society is experiencing the negative health consequences that accompany it. The Bible talks about when Mary and Joseph had the job of raising Jesus and how he “grew in wisdom and stature,” meaning they looked out for his intellectual health as well as his physical health.

It is recommended that children get at least one hour of exercise a day. As a working mother of four, I find this advice to be impractical—at the end of the day, I have no idea how much time each of my children have spent exercising. I needed a watchdog to make sure my kids are getting the exercise they need. My easy solution has been to invest in pedometers for everyone in my family. By having our brood wear pedometers, I can ensure that my children (and their parents) get the minimum of 10,000 steps recommended daily.

“And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and man” (Luke 2:52).

5. Drink more water. Soda and other sugary drinks are the No. 1 source of calories in many Americans' diets and the food item most commonly linked to weight problems. The average American gets an extra 300 calories a day in the form of liquids. By replacing liquid calories with water, it is possible to see a dramatic impact on weight problems in a short period of time.

“Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them” (John 7:37-38).

 By J’nelle Ruscetti

Don’t Turn Him Away

TEXT: MATTHEW 11:16-30

Key verse: “Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:29).

Most men are guilty of what social psychologists define as “projection,” that is, always seeing your faults in others, magnifying others’ faults and never looking inwards to locate your faults in yourself.

This is the context in which Christ spoke in our text. Immediately after appreciating John the Baptist and his ministry among the people, Jesus turned His attention to the response of the obstinate and unbelieving generation, which both John and Himself ministered unto.

Jesus condemned the attitude of the people. Since God’s will is for all men to be saved, He uses a variety of means and methods for the conversion and salvation of souls. The Jews of Jesus’ days refused every proposition offered by Him. No matter what He said or did, they took the opposite view. They were cynical and skeptical because He challenged their comfortable, secure and self-centered lives. They, therefore, criticised John the Baptist because he fasted and drank no wine. They disparaged Jesus because He ate and drank with publicans and sinners. The real objection to both men of course, was how their lives and ministries exposed the ignorance and hypocrisy of these religious people.

The ancient cities of Tyre, Sidon and Sodom were destroyed for their wickedness and sin. Jesus upbraided His own generation that if these ancient cities had seen His works, they would have repented in ashes and sackcloth. Bethsaida, Chorazin and Capernaum saw Jesus’ mighty works yet did not believe. They would suffer even greater punishment than that of the wicked cities which did not see Jesus. In the same vein, nations and cities with churches on every corner will have no excuse on judgment day if they do not repent and believe. The Bible says, “The wicked shall be turned into hell, and all the nations that forget God” (Psalm 9:17). And which individual will ever stand before God, justified for blatantly refusing to heed the entreaties to surrender to Christ, while here on earth?

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Change your heavy load for Christ’s light burden.

Prayer For New Week

I decree and declare that every power that is delaying your progress shall be destroyed today in Jesus name. Arise & Shine, it's your season of manifestation. Though you have failed in the past, but as from today, God will make you a reference point for success in Jesus name!.

Whether the devil likes it or not, like Job the Lord will give you double for your trouble in Jesus Name! Your great dreams, aspirations n revelations will surely manifest. You will not live in the shadow of God's master-plan for your life In Jesus Name!

Even if you have made the worst mistake and missed the road to the top, Christ will cause all things to work for your good.  You will recover from all your loses in Jesus Name. 

Happy New Week and New Month Of April Ahead From Us Adenike Salako Blog's World.

SHE TOOK IT BY FORCE

When she heard about Jesus, she came behind Him in the crowd and touched His garment. Mark 5: 27

The traditions of this woman's society required a woman with an issue of blood to stay indoors because she was 'unclean'.

After waiting for twelve years and hiding in the shadows, she probably said to herself, 'enough is enough. I am tired of pain and shame.'

She set her own agenda for change and began a process that totally transformed her life. But her journey of change was not an easy one.

She had to overcome some stumbling blocks. Her journey started from behind the crowd.

She was behind but she was not deterred by her placement. She was confronted with a crowd of people who were all trying to get to the same Jesus she wanted to get to.

Although there were many in contention with her, she was not discouraged.

She came from behind and pressed through the rough and tumbling mob surrounding Jesus although she was feeble in strength. She did not make excuses nor gave herself any respite.

When she finally got to Jesus, she reached out and executed her agenda. She put her faith into action. She reached out and touched the hem of Jesus' garment. That is faith in action.

She overcame:

1. Long-term disappointment

2. Physical weakness

3. Personal embarrassment

4. Society's rejection

5. Physical barriers: the crowd of people

You can also reach out in faith and set a new agenda for your life if you press on without wavering.

Prayer: Help me Lord, to press through all obstacles until i have touched your power.

Scriptural Reading: Mark 5:21-43

When storms are raging all around you, He covers you!

I recently heard someone tell this very interesting story -

A young boy went to visit a friend and while he was there playing, a storm erupted. The boy couldn’t go home of course as he would be caught in the rain and he sat there waiting quietly. Minutes later, his father came round to walk him home. He brought a very big thick coat with which he covered his son. As they walked home, the boy was in engulfed in darkness and all he could see were his shoes. He had no idea where he was going, but walked with his father anyway. After some time they got to the house and the father removed the big coat. The young boy was safely home and he was dry!

Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed and in ‘darkness’? Does it sometimes feel as if there is a storm raging all around you? Do you realise that that time when it is dark is actually because God throws His covering around you to protect you from the storm so you won’t get wet? And then He safely leads you home, hallelujah!!! It may look dark right now, you may not know where you are going but trust that God holds your hand and is safely leading you to the place of your destiny. He is shielding you from what is worse and all you can see is what is bad? Hmmm, if only God can open our eyes to see, we will be thankful all the time!

Psalm 91:4 - He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. NIV

Psalm 107:29 - He stilled the storm to a whisper; the waves of the sea were hushed.

Isaiah 4: 5-6 - Then the LORD will create over all of Mount Zion and over those who assemble there a cloud of smoke by day and a glow of flaming fire by night; over everything the glory[ will be a canopy. 6 It will be a shelter and shade from the heat of the day, and a refuge and hiding place from the storm and rain.

Isaiah 25:4 - You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in their distress, a shelter from the storm and a shade from the heat. For the breath of the ruthless is like a storm driving against a wall

Have a blessed weekend.

By sis Deby

Today: Happy Mother’s day

Love is blind because "MY MOTHER STARTED LOVING ME BEFORE SEEING MY FACE"

"I BELIEVE IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT"...Because I'VE BEEN LOVING MY MOTHER SINCE I OPENED MY EYES....

Happy Mother’s day to all Mothers, Moms, Mama, Iya, Waiting-Mothers in the World from us Adenike Salako Blog’s World.